They did the bone marrow biopsy and David took her down this time. I was feeling really sick, I had only gotten 6 hours of sleep in 3 days, so I was hoping to get a couple hours of sleep. Of course, I couldn't. They sedated her again for the test. When she woke up she was completely out of control and we couldn't calm her down. They finally gave her some morphine and she immediately calmed down. We figured she must have been in pain. I guess the needle they use had to be pretty fat to get out the marrow because it is spongy. So they say you can be pretty sore from it. Plus she doesn't do well with sedation, we found out the day before. She was crying for hours after and was grouchy the rest of the day.

The oncologist came in soon after the test and told us that they saw the leukemia cells right away and we would not have to wait for the lab results. But we would have to wait to see which type it was. ALL and AML are the two types. ALL has a much higher survival rate and the treatment is much less intense. So we had to wait a day or so to see if she had what we were hoping for - ALL. Then she could give us Brinley's survival rate.

David was very upset, but I felt kind of numb. I expected that and was ready for it when she told us. David was still holding out hope that they had been wrong. So that was it. It was a relief to know, I don't think I could have waited any longer not having an answer. It was a comfort to have an answer and gear up for what was next. At least we knew a little of what was next.

That day was rough. Brinley was so grouchy and mad and hurting, and we were so worried. I was exhausted and knew I had to sleep. I finally called my ob/gyn and told him our situation and that I had to rest or I would not be strong enough to help Brinley. He told me some sleeping pills I could take that were safe for the baby. After a very long day, we all fell asleep and slept all night for the first time. It felt wonderful!